You can improve self-esteem by practicing self-compassion, identifying your strengths, challenging intrusive thoughts, building supportive relationships, and developing daily habits that reinforce your self-worth. These small, consistent actions can help you see yourself more accurately over time.
Strong self-esteem empowers you to see and value yourself in the best, truest light possible. Many people search for practical ways to learn how to improve self esteem in everyday life.
Unfortunately, you and many others may not see yourselves this way. If you’ve been wondering how to improve self esteem, you’re not alone; many people struggle to see their own value.
In an earlier article, we discussed what self-esteem is. In future articles, we will consider other aspects of self-esteem. Here, we will address how to improve self esteem in practical ways.
Why might you want to know how to improve self esteem?
A lack of self-esteem, or low self-esteem, can negatively affect your life. That’s why understanding how to improve self esteem can be so valuable.
According to NAMI (National Alliance on Mental Health), some of the negative effects of low self-esteem can include mental health issues like depression and anxiety, as well as a tendency to have poor relationships and an inclination toward addiction.
Understanding how to build self esteem can have a lasting impact on your mental health, relationships, and overall quality of life.
In fact, having a healthy view of yourself could improve many areas of your life. Many people who learn how to improve self esteem also notice greater emotional resilience.
A review of research in 2022 from the journal American Psychologist suggests that having high self-esteem can actively help you to be more adaptable and successful in many areas of your life, including:
- Doing better in school
- Performing better at work
- Feeling physically healthier
- Improving your mental health
- Having more satisfying relationships.
How to improve self esteem: 10 effective options
So how do you go from where you currently are with self esteem to valuing yourself more?
Understanding how to improve self esteem starts with small, consistent changes in how you think and act each day.
We have put together a list of 10 ways to assist you in knowing how to boost your self esteem. Each of these ideas offers a practical approach for how to improve self esteem over time.
Don’t let this list overwhelm you.
Start by choosing one suggestion and see how it works for you. When learning how to improve self esteem, consistency matters more than perfection.
If it isn’t a good fit for you, just try something else.
1. Define your values
While this may sound like an odd suggestion since low self-esteem can cloud your ability to see the good in yourself, it may also cover up what you care about.
Often, low self-esteem focuses on you and how you think others see you.
We recommend you take some time to sit down and go over what you think is important in your life. This reflection is a foundational step in understanding how to improve self esteem through self-awareness. This could include:
- healthy personality traits like being kind, straightforward, punctual, or funny
- constructive life aspects such as learning (formally or informally), spending time with friends and family, or focusing on hobbies
- beneficial relationship goals like meeting new people or improving current relationships.
2. Flip the script: how to boost self esteem through self-talk
Encouraging self-talk is one of the most effective tools for how to improve self esteem. When you are considering how to build your self esteem, unhealthy self-talk could be a barrier you’ll need to overcome.
Self-criticism is often part of self-talk if you struggle with low self-esteem. To address this, learn to recognize when you are engaging in self-criticism.
One way to recognize it is to notice when your thoughts about yourself make you feel sad. Then take that unfavorable thought and think about what the opposite might be, and use that to build yourself up.
You may have to try out a few supportive thoughts until you find one that fits you well.
An example of doing this could be realizing that you are telling yourself that you don’t have any skills. Next, find something you are good at, big or small, and focus on your ability to do that.
You may remember that you’re a dedicated reader. So when you start to talk about not having any skills, remind yourself that you are a good reader, and repeat it until you are focusing more on that than the unhealthy belief.
3. Do the “3 good things” exercise
Similar to a gratitude journal, the 3 good things exercise involves, as the name suggests, finding three good things that happened each day. You could use an app or a regular journal to note them if you wish.
The good things are anything you find good.
This could range from a yummy snack to a productive workday to seeing a funny-shaped cloud.
This exercise is intended to shift your focus and aid you in finding the good in even the worst day. Exercises like this are simple, powerful ways to practice how to improve self esteem.
4. Be proud of your strengths and abilities
It can be challenging to see the good in yourself when you struggle with low self-esteem. Recognizing your strengths is an important step in learning how to improve self esteem.
We encourage you to celebrate when you discover an area where you do well. Remember that these are what you think you do well; they do not have to be approved by anyone else.
Once you have determined what you are good at, remind yourself of those skills when you start to talk down to yourself.
You could also begin sharing your abilities with others by making something for someone, telling someone about a win you had, or sharing interesting facts about a passion of yours.
Don’t worry when not everyone matches your feelings; keep enjoying your own achievements and strengths.
5. Learn to accept compliments
If you are living with low self-esteem, it can be overwhelming to accept compliments due to thinking you don’t have anything to be complimented on.
Being complimented may be awkward, especially if you are not used to it. Sometimes you might try to play it off as ‘not a big deal’, a skill ‘everyone’ has, or that you ‘didn’t really do much’.
One of the simplest ways to break this cycle is to only say “thank you.” No explanation, no deflection, just thank you. Even though this may feel uncomfortable at first, as you learn how to build your self esteem, you can become more comfortable with it.
6. Be kind to yourself
The nature of low self-esteem is that it often puts you in the position of being a bully to yourself. Emphasizing your imperfections, berating yourself for mistakes, and believing that others see you the same way you see yourself can take a toll on your mental health.
Practicing self-compassion is an important step in learning how to boost self esteem. Self-compassion is often overlooked when people try to learn how to improve self esteem.
Knowing how to be kind to yourself might also help balance out your mental health. This may look like avoiding the urge to compare yourself to others, pulling back on your people-pleasing tendencies, or doing special things for yourself.
7. Practice self-care
When you spend a lot of time focusing on unhealthy thought patterns about yourself, it could lead you to believe that you don’t deserve anything special. This is far from the truth. Everyone needs occasional pick-me-ups.
Taking care of yourself physically and emotionally can reinforce how to improve self esteem. Be sure to make an effort to add activities into your life that bring you joy. They don’t have to be expensive or fancy.
You could take a bike ride through a park, paint your nails at home, grab a special dessert from a local bakery, or go shopping with a friend.
Remember: You are worthy of happiness!
8. Connect with like-minded people to build self-esteem
Connecting with others who share your faith, passions, or hobbies is another option when considering how to improve your self esteem.
Being around others with whom you share common interests can foster camaraderie with people who have the same interests as you.
It could be a chance for you to spend time with others who have already built up their self-esteem, are comfortable with who they are, and know what they enjoy. This might just rub off on you, as a way to help you understand how to boost your own self-esteem.
9. Find a support network
Similarly to connecting with like-minded people, spending time with people who support you could provide an opportunity to experience what it feels like to be accepted and cared for.
This may certainly have a helpful impact on your self-esteem, and is a practical option when learning how to improve self esteem.
You could find people to be a part of your support network through a local church or other faith-based group, topic-specific support groups such as grief, drug or alcohol, or peer-to-peer groups.
Having people you can call when you need some help is important for everyone.
10. Consider online therapy
No matter what, you may want to consider speaking to an online therapist. Talking to a specialized online therapist can help t you see the good in yourself that you might not be able to see on your own. They can provide you with guided exercises and tools for how to improve self esteem safely and effectively.
One common practice when working with an online therapist is to engage in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT). CBT can assist with overcoming self-defeating and self-destructive thought patterns. Understanding how to address the emotions and behaviors associated with low self-esteem is important when learning how to improve self esteem.
You deserve to feel good about who you are
Low self esteem could be keeping you from living your best life, and you don’t have to stay where you are now. No matter where you start, learning how to improve self esteem takes patience, support, and intentional practice.
Whether you start with one of the suggestions above or seek out online therapy through Makin Wellness, we are rooting for you to learn how to improve your self-esteem.
Makin Wellness offers you personalized and convenient online therapy, with online therapists who are here to walk with you as you learn to believe more in yourself.
No matter where you begin, learning how to build self esteem is a journey, and every small step forward matters.
Online therapy provides a safe, supportive space to:
- Learn how to improve self-esteem
- Practice evidence-based techniques to reframe your thoughts, like CBT, with professional guidance
- Help you choose and follow through with activities that may show you how to boost your self esteem
- Set goals that reflect your values.
You deserve to walk through life with confidence. Your Makin Wellness online therapist is here to help with that when you’re ready.
And if you are unsure whether online therapy is right for you, don’t worry: your online therapist can help answer any questions you have about how to improve self esteem in your first session together.
Call us at (833)-274-heal or click here to schedule an appointment with one of our caring online therapists today.
